March 27: Complicated!

It has been a couple months since I've posted measurements, so I'm doing so today. :) I am not super thrilled with what the numbers show, but what I AM happy about... is that I am CREEPING towards being under 200 pounds!! 4 more pounds to go!!! :) LOL. it's kind of funny, you'd think I'd be a little embarassed to be publicly throwing my weight out there like some girls probably would be.... but you know what... it's called confidence. ;)  I could care LESS what the scale says, because my mirror is looking GOOD! :P Hehe...

Seriously though, I really do feel absolutely amazing.  I look and feel entirely different than I did a year ago, and I'm loving it. My clothes fit way better, I have tons more energy, I just feel stronger & healthier in every way!

So, two months ago, I started lifting at the gym. At that time, I was also in kickboxing classes. Those only lasted a few weeks, and then I was just doing the lifting for an hour a day. I have been consistent with that, and can feel myself getting stronger... and it's only been 2 months! The past couple of weeks I've been re-adding the 30 minutes to an hour of cardio that I did last year each day, because I know that's the ticket to losing this weight. Cardio plus weights.

 I have also been aiming to stick to a low-carb diet. The first few days were confusing, because I didn't realize how many carbs are in most foods. Fruit, Yogurt, Cottage Cheese, etc, etc....many things that you'd think are healthy..... it's baffling! But I found some awesome low-carb wraps that I love... I even had a reuben on one of those wraps on St.Patricks day, and let me tell you... it was AMAZING. I just had a little of the thousand island dressing on it... it was low fat/ lower carb thousand island dressing I found. Seriously, as long as I keep finding ways to incorporate some yummy things into this lower carb diet... I could totally foresee myself sticking to it! 

I'm not gonna lie, I have had 'bad' days. Yesterday for example, the kids chose to go to the Drive In to eat which just re-opened for the 'spring/ summer' [ even though there's still ten feet of snow outside. :P  ].... and there, I had a small root beer, and a burger. :S I didn't feel super horrible about it, because I have enough self control to have something like that once a month or so, and not crave it or want it any other times. I have definitely craved some carbs in the afternoon.. it's usually around 2-3pm when that happens... but I've been decent about not giving in. I've had days where I'd have a granola bar or something, and then I'd kick myself in the butt for it... I felt so bad! 
 

The thing that I find super interesting is the fact that.. now that I'm watching carbs, I'm realizing HOW MANY CARBS I was eating before!! Even over the past year when I was dieting, for a snack I would have 2  peanut butter toast on whole grain bread sometimes... and yes, that's a LOT of carbs. 


I was very skeptical of the whole 'low carb' idea for over a year.... when I first met people who tried talking me into trying it, I thought they were crazy. With my reasearch, one thing  I'm finding is that going low carb is a really good way to cut fat. What I've read is that when your body doesn't have those carbs for energy, it burns your fat for energy instead.  

Strangely, I'm still sort-of in the skeptical phase to a point. In the sense that, I do think it's okay to have SOME carbs. Not A TON like I was, unknowingly, before. But I think that if I have a greek yogurt... which has like 30 carbs per serving.... I don't think that's a horrendous thing, is it? I haven't been having more than around 30 grams of carbs despite my skepticism....because I want to see if this really works. However a part of me  feels like your body needs SOME whole grain,  nutritional carbs to function normally. I don't know, call me crazy! I'm still trying to figure it all out. I have talked to my dietician about carb cycling, and cutting carbs, and he thinks it's bad to mess with your body like that.

The frustrating part is, there are 'scientific' articles alll over the internet stating how cutting carbs is a good thing.... and likewise, there are articles stating that cutting carbs is a very bad thing. It's just frustrating that things can't be more straight forward. Everyone's body is different, and what works for one person doesn't necessarily work for us all, so I'm just trying to figure out what works best for me. I know for sure that cutting a huge amount of the sugar and carbs has made me feel really good. I used to have like 2-3 coffee's a day, with 2 sugars and 2 liquid creamer cups.... and now I realize just how many carbs & sugar that was right there.. a lot. *sigh* Not having sugar has honestly made me wayyyy less moody. When I have delved into a little more sugar, I have had a really bad headache. That seems to kind of tell me that my body was addicted to sugar... and that I'm pretty much un-addicted now. The headache I get from sugar now isn't even worth it!

It's just a struggle figuring it all out. I want to be the healthiest I can, I want to be in good shape... I will do ANYTHING that works here.... I just wish it wasn't so complicated!

 

So, here goes with my measurements::::: Starting with the last ones I took, in January:

January 27, 2014

Current Weight 207

Waist:  36.5"

Hips :  46"

Neck: 14"

Forearm over birthmark: 10.5"

Upper Arm: 12.5"

Calf : 17"

Mid thigh: 20"

Upper Thigh: 25.5"

Body fat %: 46.12 %




March 27, 2014

Current Weight: 203

Waist: 36.5"

Hips: 45"

Neck: 13.8"

Forearm over birthmark: 10.5"

Upper Arm: 13.5"

Calf: 17"

Mid thigh: 21.5'

Upper Thigh: 26"

Body fat %:  45.29




LOL the funny thing is, a few of my measurements went UP  about an inch for the first time since I've been measuring [ Upper arms, mid & upper thigh ] yet my clothes are looser than ever and I'm feeling my best yet!! :)
 

I'm thinking I am going to make an appointment with my doctor to check all my 'stats', see how healthy I am, and see if they can actually figure out my actual body fat percentage. The only way I come up with the above percentages, is by an online calculator where you input your neck inches, waist inches, weight, and height. I'm not 100% convinced of it's accuracy considering everyone has a different body type & such. So my goal for this month is to really check into things and see where I'm at here.


Well,  hopefully things will be even better in a couple more months! Honestly, I don't see how they couldn't with everything I'm doing. I would LOVE to be at like 199 at least... hahah.... like I said I don't care about the number so much, but it would kind of feel good to be under 200 for the first time in almost 8 years!!! I already weigh way less than I have in 8 years, so that's something. :) 

A few changes!

<<  For real though!


Hey guys!

So, it's been a few weeks since I posted last. I have been doing really well with everything, I think!

One thing that has noticeably made me feel different/ better in the past few weeks, is that I've changed my eating habits A LOT. I *thought* I was doing the right things.... around 1600 calories, low-fat, whole grains, yogurts, fruits, veggies.

However, I have heard from a few different sources that going low-carb, high-protein is the way to go. I'm finding this to be true. I used to think that things like nonfat cottage cheese, bananas, greek yogurt, whole grain pasta, granola bars, etc were all really good things to have throughout the day. Do you have any idea how many carbs are in all of that stuff?! A LOT.

The main reason I never really went low carb before despite the fact that everyone said it was the way to go, is I didn't know/ understand WHY it's the way to go. I'm one of those stubborn people who needs to know 'why' before I do things. I need to know how things work, before just taking other people's word for things.

Basically, by eating low carb.. your body resorts to burning stored fat for energy, rather than carbohydrates. That's what I gather from what I've read, in a nutshell. I've also read that it can cause moodiness and hormone fluctuations. LOL... which I've gotta say, I think may be true. Especially at first... it was strangely emotional not eating carbs. :P

What I personally aim to do, is eat as little of carbs as possible. If I'm going to incorporate carbs, I try to do that around lunch time or so. Not dinner. However, I have had a serving of whole grain noodles at dinner time, or a low carb wrap. I try to keep my carb count low, eat every 2-3 hours or so, something small. Typically I'm finding my carb intake to be under 30g carbs for the day. I've read that under 50-150g is actually considered 'low carb' as well, so if I go over the 30 I don't beat myself up, I just aim to stay low.

I haven't been having any sugar or liquid creamer in my coffee, either. The powder creamer I use is less than 1 carb per serving so I measure out 2 servings, and typically only have 1 coffee a day anyways. 2 tops. Then one day last week I had a cookie, because Deslin picked a box of 'red velvet' cookies out at the store just for me, because he thought I'd love them. So I had to have one. I got a headache almost immediately, felt sick, disappointed in myself, and strangely..... anytime in the past few months when I've had a cheat meal... I almost feel hungover!! Just nauseous and dizzy, and sick! So strange. So, that really helps me stay on track with eating right too.

As far as working out goes... I've been doing great. One new thing I've been doing is I have a notebook where I have 6 pages full of workouts. One page per workout day. They are Chest/ tricep, Shoulders/abs, Legs, Bicep/Tricep, Abs at-home workout, and Back / Bicep.

I've been doing these workouts since I started at the gym, but I added a few that I found on bodybuilding.com, and my 'my fitness buddy' app. Each workout lasts an hour, and I've been doing cardio afterwards.  This past week I've been making sure that I get my cardio in. I had been slacking on that for a while, but it's time to get my head back in the game & get on that.

I've also been writing down the date, and what body area I'm working out that day in a different section of the notebook, so I can keep track of what I should be doing and in what order.. as well as how much cardio I'm getting. So far here's what I've done since I've been keeping track::


2/24: Back/ Bicep
2/25: Chest/ Tricep
2/26: Legs
2/27: Shoulders/ Abs
2/28: Off-out of town
3/1: Bicep/ Tricep + 1 hr elliptical
3/2: Legs
3/3: off- Worked 11-7 and didn't make it.
3/4: Back/ Bicep + 1 hr elliptical
3/5: Chest/ Tricep
3/6: Abs at home + 30 min elliptical
3/7: Off- skating show weekend
3/8: Off- Skating show weekend
3/9: Legs
3/10: Shoulders/ Abs + 1 hr elliptical
3/11: Tricep/ Bicep + 40 min elliptical
3/12: Back/ Bicep + 30 min elliptical.


I'm pretty happy with how things are going I'd say. One thing I do want to do maybe in a couple weeks, is start a workout program from bodybuilding.com, and see how that goes. There's one called " Jamie Eason's Live Fit Trainer" that I'm thinking I'm going to try. It's a 12 week program and I think it'll be good to change things up a bit soon. She has specific work outs for each day, along with a basic meal guide... which types of food to eat and when. She also encourages eating every 2-3 hours like I already am, lots of egg whites & veggies.. nothing too different from what I'm already doing besides the workouts are just a little bit different. Won't hurt to try! :)

Anyways that's about all I have for now. One of these days I need to take current measurements & post them. I am most definitely seeing and feeling changes... for example, the other day I flexed my hip muscles and it was so funny, because I don't think I've ever had noticeable hip muscles before. lol...and my legs are much more toned, my butt is taking on more shape. I'm just loving this!!!! :)

Pictures of Progress!!

There's not a whole lot new to report. ...

I have been consistently doing strength training. I can feel so much more muscle on my body,and I am LOVING that! My legs & biceps primarily. I can feel a LOT less flub on my belly than before, too. lol... I can see small changes in my overall appearance. My butt for example, is starting to take on a better shape I think!

The scale has kind of been at a standstill, but I'm not super concerned with that. I have driven myself absolutely nuts a few times throughout this whole process by obsessively weighing myself. A few findings: In the morning, you always weigh a LOT less than you do in the evening. Your weight can fluctuate within 5-10 pounds throughout the week, based on so many different factors. It will drive you crazy if you get too carried away with the scale.

I have fallen off the 'good eating' bandwagon a little bit. I was doing so so good, and then I've had ice cream, a cookie one day a week or so ago, a piece of pizza this past weekend, and today I had a biscuit at work. Ugh!!! It is most definitely the most frustrating part of all of this.

Okay, so Lord knows I have a lonnng way to go, but I am so happy to be where I am right now, compared to where I was last year at this time! Yes there are struggles and set backs from time to time, but it's all SO worth it.  Just as a refresher, I'm going to post  'Then & Now" pictures. They pretty much speak for themselves!

February 2013

Those were taken at my sisters baby shower, and I looked like I was the pregnant one!! :(



February 2014

I mean............. look at the difference!!!! And I am not only confident, I am ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE that by February 2015.... there will be some more major changes.








Looking at these pictures, it's hard to get down on myself for my setbacks. I have lost a ton of weight, gained some muscle, and have a bit of a WAIST again for the first time since I was preggo with Deslin in 2007. This is exciting stuff!! :)

Please, do not ask me ' How is your diet going?" I've been asked that a few times and it's irritating. This is NOT a diet. This is my life.

My plan of action currently is this:

* STOP weighing myself for a few months.
* EAT CLEAN and stay on track with eating. This will of course be challenging as usual, but this is what I really NEED to do at this point to make major progress.
* Continue weight training
* Add more cardio. I've been doing about 2-3 hours a week of cardio, and I need to double that to what it was before I started weight training.






So that's about all for now. I am so excited for this entire year. I already have so much more confidence and am so sure of myself. Nothing and no one will get in my way, I can promise you that. :)



 << LOL. Sorry Joe, but I'd have to do the same. ;) heheh..








Also, for anyone who is 'bothered' by my workout posts::  :P Ahh I'm such a dork and love these.

The Neverending Journey

 

Just starting out with an adorable random picture of my two main reasons for all of this!! 

Okay, so the last time I posted, I posted my measurements. I didn't post a link to that one on Facebook, because I was just super super frustrated with myself for 'taking a step back' over October through December.

On January 27th when I made that last post, my weight was 207, and that's still what my scale is showing today. It's only been like 8 days so I can't be too hard on myself. I'm just a little irritated because I have been working my a** off. However, I KNOW this isn't a super fast process.. I know 8 days is a little soon to be expecting ANY kind of results.

Having said that, I have to say.... even though the scale isn't reflecting any changes, I do FEEL amazing.... I LOVE working out. I LOVE knowing I'm getting healthy & fit. It may not happen 'fast', but it'll happen. I can promise you that! I honestly do feel as though I can see and feel a bit more definition in my legs and arms, and my belly feels smaller.... but that could all be in my head. :P

I think my main frustration is STILL being over 200 lbs. I will be beside myself with excitement when I see '199' on the scale. I know it will give me the faith in myself that I need to push myself even harder. I feel like I push myself hard now, but it's a process. My body wasn't physically strong enough to push very hard just one year ago, but I have come a LONG way. Even since starting strength training roughly 3 weeks ago, I feel more and more confident in what I can do, and in pushing my limits. I just never want to stop!


[ My ideal body!!! ------->>>]



I do get super tired during the day sometimes. I need to make sure I'm getting enough sleep. That's one of the big struggles for me. However, a year ago before starting any kind of working out... I was so physically & mentally exhausted and in denial of what was happening to me, that I was ALWAYS tired. I always went and laid in bed and napped. I just felt like that was going to be my life, forever.  I'm positive it was some depression kicking in, and I'm beyond thankful that I somehow pulled myself out of that last February when I decided to change things.

It was around mid February when I first really started to be serious about losing weight last year.  It's been kind of baby steps since that day. I started out with half an hour on the elliptical a few times a week.. That would wipe me right out at first. Then changed up my eating quite a bit....then went an hour on the elliptical... then went more days a week on top of that... it's all just a process. I'm STILL on that journey now, almost exactly 1 year later. In about 2 weeks it will be 1 full year. Oh how I would LOVE to lost another 12 pounds by then, so I could say I lost 50 in the last year. Who knows if that will happen or is even possible.... but it won't hurt to try!!

It can be really easy to fall into a state of mind time and again where you feel like this is as good as it gets... like you can't do it. You can never be your 'ideal' self. It's during those times that I need to reflect and give myself some credit. This past year, I have gone from having ZERO fitness or good eating habits, to  being pretty good and consistent with an hour of cardio most days of the week. I've also started strength training, and have gotten really good at counting calories and self control. I've also lost 40 pounds. I mean, yes you see people on these weight loss shows who just drop it like it's hot.. haha!! That can be irritating when you feel like you're doing the best you can. But, I know that my 'best' right now , isn't going to be my 'best' a year from now. I'm constantly improving. I won't allow myself to go backwards any more. It's only going to get better from here, and I need to remind myself of that.

Even if the day comes where I am physically where I want to be and maintaining,,,, there will always be some aspect of my life I will be working on making better. Life's a journey, you have to love the PROCESS of evolving and changing for the better. Because like I said.. once you reach your goals, there's always more goals to be made and dominated.

 If I can do this, I promise you anyone can. It's a process but it's worth it, and it's baby steps. It doesn't have to be some big overwhelming thing all at once. 

Measurements January 27, '14.

Alright, there hasn't been immense change since the last time I took measurements. So, I"m starting this post out with the measurements from the last 2 times I took them. From September to November there was my 'normal' range of change that had kept pace for all of last year. After Novembers measurements, I gained about 7 pounds after the Holidays... so I was at 212. This set me back a couple months progress, sadly. However in the past week I have lost 7 of that, so I am currently down to 207. . still 2 pounds above where I was in November, but with the weight training and cardio mix & keeping calories under 1400 I'm pretty confident progress will continue to speed up a little. Let's hope, anyways!



 
SEPTEMBER 27, 2013





weight: 211

Waist: 37.5"

Hips: 48"

Neck:: 14"

Forearm over birthmark: 10.5"

Upper Arm: 13"

Calf, an inch below the knee, widest part: 17"

Mid thigh: 21"

Upper thigh: 26"

Body fat %: 49.16%
















November 20th, 2013



Weight 205

Waist:  36.5"

Hips :  46"

Neck: 14"

Forearm over birthmark: 10.5"

Upper Arm: 13"

Calf : 17"

Mid thigh: 21"

Upper Thigh: 25.5"

Body fat %: 46.12 %








 January 27, 2014

[ This month shows I gained two pounds since November... actually,  during December I had gained about 7 pounds since Novembers post.. so after the holidays I was at 212 and recently lost 5 of that.]


Current Weight 207

Waist:  36.5"

Hips :  46"

Neck: 14"

Forearm over birthmark: 10.5"

Upper Arm: 12.5"

Calf : 17"

Mid thigh: 20"

Upper Thigh: 25.5"

Body fat %: 46.12 %


My inches haven't gone down much if at all, but they haven't gone up either. I am just happy right now that I have lost 5 of the 7 pounds I gained during the Holidays. I am so beyond confident that the weight training mixed with my cardio is exactly what I've been needing to propel this weight loss further! I am inching towards being under 200 lbs, and I cannot WAIT until that day comes... I will NEVER look back. I will make this happen... by the end of this year I foresee myself being in pretty great shape! :)

"Me Time" as a good example!

Alright, my first day lifting at the gym was Friday the 17th of January. It has now been 9 days since I started, and I'm pretty sure I'm hooked. :)

My C4, lifting gloves, mocha capuccino protein, and mixer bottle came in the mail yesterday. I was so thrilled! There was also a huge snowstorm yesterday so the boys' hockey game was cancelled, but we hit up the gym anyways. I slid into a guardrail/ almost DIED on the way there, but I made it! lol...

Last week I did my weight training and also did the Cardio Kickboxing classes on Monday & Wednesday. I was pretty sore after the first 'leg day' I had. That soreness lasted a few days, but I loved it... I loved knowing and physically FEELING that I had gotten in an awesome workout! Even being sore, I still got through the kickboxing and did great. I had been sure my legs were going to collapse under me but I toughed through it.

 This week, I have to skip Monday night kickboxing because I have a 'mandatory' meeting at work. Kind of bummed about missing it, but I'll just do an hour on my elliptical instead. Yesterday was the first day I took my C4, and I had SO much energy left after the gym that I hit up the elliptical at home afterwards for half an hour. Best workout ever!!

Today I intended to do my elliptical too, but when I got home it was already around 6:30 and the kids were starving. So I made dinner, then watched the tail end of a movie with them, got a few chores done, then got them to bed. I am determined to make sure I get in at least 4 days of cardio this week on top of the weight training, but I'd love to make it 5 days. We shall see what the week holds.

I have been doing awesome with my eating. I've been around 1400 calories per day, give or take maybe 100 calories. I have been writing everything in a 'fit journal' the past few days rather than using the myfitnesspal app. It's just easier to refer back to. I'm also trying to write down which routine we did each day, so I can hopefully remember them better.

Alrighty, so today here is what I had:

Breakfast:
1/2 tbsp coconut oil------60c
3 egg whites--------------51c
1c spinach-----------------7c
2 pc whole grain bread -200c

Snack:
1 banana--------------------100c
8 oz fat free milk..............90c

Lunch:
1 beef jerky-------------80c
1/4c sunflower seeds--190c

Snack:

3 squares of ghiardelli intense dark chocolate  [72% cacao]  ----230c

Dinner:

4oz turkey breast...........153c
2c spinach.......................14c

After-workout:

2 scoops of protein............240c
8 oz fat free milk...............90c




1505 calories for today! :) [ maybe a small amount more, because I had about 1 piece of cauliflower and 2 slices of onion in my spinach salad. ;)   ]   I don't feel hungry or deprived, I feel full & satisfied & proud of myself, lol :)


I could've done without all the dark chocolate....... probably smarter sticking to ONE square of it instead of 3. I just saw the serving size on the package, so that's how much I had,without really thinking about it.

Anyways I think everything is going very well! According to MY scale, I lost around 4-6 pounds in the last week. However, I don't feel like I can always trust my scale. Joe says it's because I weigh myself numerous times a day, so I get frustrated when I see how it fluctuates depending on the time of day and other factors...when I should be only doing it once per week. It's just hard not to check whenever I go near it! I will only count the actual pounds lost at the end of each month, not for each week. Last year it was around 4-6 pounds a month, but I've lowered my calorie intake and started weight training so who knows what will happen this year.



I am thinking that tomorrow I'll do measurements. I also want to take some 'before' pictures. :) I probably won't post the 'before' pictures until I've got some nice 'after' ones to put next to them. ;)

I'm pretty fine with posting my measurements. It'll be interesting to see how they compare to the ones I took last. Hopefully there'll be at least some positive change! It was November 20th when I took them last.

One last thing I'd like to say tonight is how happy I am, that I'm being a good example for my kids! They are going to know a lot of things about being healthy and active and taking care of themselves, that I never knew or even thought about when I was young. They are going to learn just by watching me, and that makes me super happy... it makes me feel like a better mom than I was before, and it is a huge motivational factor for me.

 This weight training is like a double positive thing... it's a fun, healthy, strangely relaxing & addicting thing for me.... the perfect ' me' time... and it's ALSO a good, positive, wonderful example to my kids. I just can't honestly find any reason NOT to continue doing this! There's NO type of lifestyle I prefer.

The thing that might deter some people to anything fitness related, is the idea that you can 'never' eat certain foods again. Not true! You totally can, just not every single day, or every single week! I honestly love all of the healthy foods that I've been sticking to. Yet I know that if the day comes when I REALLY want some pizza or something, I know I will allow myself to have some for a 'cheat' meal. The other week Joe wanted to order Irenes pizza, so I had 4 of the small squares of it, and was full. In the past, I probably would've had about twice that much.


 It's not about completely depriving yourself. It's about learning to like things that are healthy / that you should have been liking all along.

 You just feel better in every way, and the idea of eating pizza or 'fast food' honestly makes me feel sick... because I know if I did eat that stuff, I would feel sick to my stomach. I've had cheat meals in the last year, that I completely regretted afterwards. Not because I overdid it, but because my body was not used to the junk anymore.


Well that's all for tonight! Stay tuned for the measurements tomorrow! ;)

Feelin' the BURN!!

Today was my 3rd day lifting at the gym... and I've just gotta say....... I LOVE this!!!!!!!!!!

.Love ...love ........LOVE it!!!!!!!

I'm sorry if that's annoyingly over-enthusiastic but I have honestly always been in awe of people who have been in great shape, and I am so committed to getting there!!!! It's super exciting to me! Obviously I am realistic, and I  realize that it isn't 'easy', and it isn't a fast process. That's fine with me.. I'm not going to get there at ALL by not doing weight training, so I am just thoroughly excited that I have finally begun this! Even if it takes me 5 years, I am doing this!!

A HUGE HUGE shout out to the most inspirational person I know right now, Tazia!! She has been teaching me the ropes, and showing me exactly what I need to do to whoop my a** into shape! I couldn't be more thankful...... what an awesome thing to be willing to do!! I'm sure I slow her down a lot since she has to take the time to show me what I'm doing, but I am so very thankful that she doesn't seem to mind. I am so excited for the day when I can just go to the gym and KNOW exactly what I'm doing, and do it all by myself! It will be all thanks to her! I couldn't have ever started this without her... I would've probably made myself look like a fool, who doesn't know what the hell they're doing, haha! But I have full trust that these workouts she's teaching me will get me to where I want to be,  because she is in prime shape, so she obviously knows her stuff!!

Also~

I've done some research, and there was interesting website I came across that stated just how important weight training is. There was a study done on 3 groups of people.

The first group simply dieted, and lost 14.6 pounds of fat on average, in 12 weeks.

The second group dieted, and did aerobics, and lost 15.6 pounds of fat on average, in 12 weeks. [Only ONE pound more.]

The third group dieted, did aerobics, and strength training, and lost 21.1 pounds of fat in 12 weeks. 44% more!!!!

[Click HERE to go to the article/ webpage I'm referring to]


 That is exciting stuff. I have a good 50 pounds more to lose before I'm really happy with where I am. I am super confident that it will all be off by the end of this year, and hopefully even way sooner...but definitely for sure by the end of the year. Plus I'll have some awesome muscle tone!

I have been eating super freaking awesome/clean, doing my weight training with her, and on Mondays & Wednesdays I have been going to kickboxing... and by the end of kickboxing, my entire butt & legs are on fire!! I LOVE that burn!!! :) I know kickboxing is cardio and I'm pretty sure I sweat out like 5 pounds during it, LOL... but I need to jump on the elliptical on Tuesdays & Thursdays at least. I had Joe bring the treadmill downstairs and bring my elliptical back up, because I've gotta admit.. I do hate trying to jog, and my elliptical has always kicked my butt when I am on it for an hour of intervals. I need to get back to that instead .

As far as eating, I have ZERO problem avoiding 'bad' foods. I just keep my mind set on just how much bad foods will set me back. I know it's okay to have a 'bad' meal once in a while, like once a week or once a month, but I am dedicated to eating allll good/ healthy stuff at least for the next 6 weeks!

Today we went to Taco Bell, and I didn't get one single thing. Joe ordered 4 of the spicy buffalo chicken grillers... my FAVORITE thing... but I had zero desire to have one. I had a beef jerky and some pomegranate instead and felt amazing about that.

The other day I ordered some C4, some 'mocha-cappuccino' flavored protein, weight-lifting gloves [ as Tazia recommended], a Polar heart rate bracelet/ monitor/ calorie burn tracker , and today I went & bought a ton of new workout clothes!!

The last time I really went shopping for clothes, was last February.... almost exactly a year ago. I remember HATING what I saw in the mirror... and ladies, hating yourself, no matter your size, is never a good thing. I was SO down in the dumps and depressed, and having a total 'poor me' attitude. Then one day I was just like, " EFF this...... I am changing this."

I'm not really sure why I didn't make that decision sooner.... I had Deslin when I was 20, and now I'm 27. Yes, I loved every single second of time with my sweet babies, but health wise... I completely ruined myself in my 20's. I am SO annoyed about that, but I am the only one who can change it. I'm the only one who can get off my ass and dedicate myself to living the kind of life I want to live. No one can come along and do that for me.... but on that note, I have got to say I feel so so blessed by how supportive every one has been, and how helpful people have been!!  I am honestly so thankful for the encouragement and positive attitude everyone around me has had, not to mention the people who have went out of their way to teach me a thing or two!

No one can change my life for me, but I know I couldn't do this completely on my own, with out the love and support and positivity of those around me.


Welll... I just got back from kick boxing, and am going to start painting the living room with Joe. *Excited!!* I bought some 'peacock blue' paint... it's almost like a darkish teal. I have wanted to do this for so long! We've owned this house for almost 3 years now, and I FINALLY decided what color I want the living room. Now to decide for the rest of the house..... lol :)


Then I am hitting the hay!! Back at it in the morning!!!!! :D